We are back for part two, following a post on why I don’t have it all together and you don’t have to either.
Do you ever find yourself surprisingly comforted reading about what it really looks like inside someone else’s life? I love seeing what things are really like for someone else, and remembering I’m not alone in my imperfections! So my goal is to provide the same here and show you all the ways I don’t have it all together and hopefully remind you that you don’t have to either.
Here’s what it’s really like to be me lately:
- I’m getting so distracted by the big things, I’m letting ALOT of little things slip.
- I am not keeping up with friends like I want & need to.
- I almost never have any less than 2-3 dozen tabs open on my computer at any given time.
- I’ve been way too excited to sleep, what with all the work & plans, dreaming & scheming going on around here. There always seems to be more important things to do than sleep, but this has done more than increase my productivity level. It’s also decreased my general efficiency and probably health and cognition level 😉
- I’ve stopped exercising anywhere near as much as I need and want to.
- I am sometimes showering every two or three days lately. This hasn’t happened since I had a newborn in the house. See #5 here. Yep that’s me! And I’m doing it to myself …. Can you relate?
- I’ve dropped more balls than I’d like to admit when it comes to juggling details of my kids’ lives and their schedules.
- I’ve had a handful of really important tasks on my to-do list that just keep returning, day after day after day! Yep, my to-do list is often Just. Like. Groundhogs. Day.
- My phone’s voicemail is almost always at or over capacity these days.
- I have let my standards of clean relax ALOT lately to get more done in other ways.
- My car is usually littered with evidence of a life on-the-go, especially the back seat. Ahem. Kids! Enough said. I may have resorted to hoping it will clean itself while I’m busy doing everything else! 😉
- There have been times in the last few days I’ve been so tired and bleary-eyed, I’ll swear I recognize someone out & about, smile and wave only to find out it’s not at all who I thought it was. True story. Or go through a drive-thru and keep sitting and waiting even after receiving my order. Whattt? Now, that was a first!
- I’m having one of those ‘milestone’ birthdays in about a week, and I’m still trying to figure out just how I feel about it. Cause right now, not only can I not believe it, but I’m not so excited about it – but I’m also not thrilled about not being thrilled about it. HA 😉
I sometimes succumb to convincing myself that other women have it all together. Sometimes it feels like they know something I don’t and I’d give anything to figure out how they ‘get it all done’ and still manage to eat healthy, stay in shape, manage their homes, connect with their spouses, and take care of their kids.
But deep down?
I know the truth is every single person I look at and think she’s got it all figured out could actually list so many ways she’s really a work in progress too. We may not always get a window into other women’s lives, but I hope taking this peek into mine has reminded you that you are not alone. You are in good company being perfectly imperfect. One of my favorite authors, Brene Brown said it this way, “Imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together.”
This life is come as you are. So let us show up each day ready to do what we can do and ready to let go of what we can’t do. And when we forget? His mercies are new every morning, and His grace never runs out!
So, tell me! Can you relate? What experience or insight do you have to share?
Awesome post 🙂 I pinned it – I DEFINITELY find it helpful. Often Ifeel so ‘behind’ like everyone else is living this fabulous life and I am a failure. I know it isn’t true – but sometimes it helps to see the proof 😉
Yes, I so agree it helps to see everyone else is real, relatable, and faced with the same challenges every day as the rest of us 😉 So thankful grace never runs out!
ahhh yes – comparison is the thief of JOY.
I’m a list maker and my list never goes away but my thoughts are….if I don’t get to it, it will wait for me. 🙂
but – with friendships, keeping up with 1 or 2 a week – that is awesome. even if its just an email/text – fb hello…something.
thanks for the smile
@spreadingJOY
Marie
Thanks for visiting She Lives Free and for your sweet comment 🙂
I’m not sure how comforting it is to realize that everybody else is losing it to. I feel like pretending to have it all together is the only thing that keeps most of the balls in the air some days.
Oh Shecki, bless your honesty as you struggle – I’m glad you reached out here. As my wise friend Aly said today, “”When I share my broken parts, I am agreeing with Jesus and celebrating the gospel” ….. “God isn’t looking for gold vessels. He isn’t looking for silver vessels. He is looking for yielded vessels.”
Psalm 46:10 says, “Cease striving and know that I am God” Trying to be in control and relinquishing control at the same time just doesn’t work; they can’t co-exist inside the same heart. When we let God take control of our lives and trust that He knows best, we are able to rest and stop striving, which means that we will ultimately experience peace.
I will pray for you to find rest and peace in Him as you relinquish the try-hard life and depend on Him alone to sustain and strengthen you! xoxo
You are not alone! I found myself nodding as I read your list, many (if not all) of the things I could relate to doing! Love your honesty and your heart. Keeping it real helps.
You are just the best. Love you!
Yes! I feel like everything you said has been my life lately (minus the kids). And while I love all of the fun planning and working on great projects, I keep running into the same thing over and over again. That I need rest. And I need to make that rest be real. But then as soon as I turn to the left or the right, there seems to be someone else who’s making it happen and doesn’t seem to need the rest and I wonder why I can’t handle it. But it’s just not the case. We’re all right there with ya!
Samantha, you have no idea how encouraging your comment was to me – thank you!! I especially loved exactly how you said, “I need to make that rest be real.” Wishing you blessings as you find rest in Him! xoxo
This post is so real! I find I can relate with so many of these above, you are so right – none of us a perfect! I always have at least 9-10 tabs open at all times! haha
Haha yep you know it! Thanks for visiting She Lives Free and for your sweet comment 🙂
I have days where I wake up and start thinking about how excited I am to go back to sleep. Stress is getting to be a lot but I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who doesn’t have everything together. <3
Yep, you are so not alone! Thanks for being here, Alyssa!
I can totally relate! Sometimes I feel a ping of jealousy when I read other blogs because it seems like they have everything together but then I feel silly because I know that I’m only seeing a piece of their life. It’s hard sometimes, but it’s so nice to know that we aren’t alone in trying to balance everything!
Sooo not alone – so glad to see all the feedback here, so we can all be reminded of that! Thanks for visiting, Sarah! Hugs xoxo
Amen and amen 🙂 I think about my own relationship with God and figured that if I waited until I had my ducks in a row before I approach him, I would never come! Because we have that kind of grace available to us, we are also able to extend a similar grace to others and yes! To ourselves as well.
I absolutely love this comment – such good reminders here! I think I may just come back and read it again and again!
So good. So true and honest. Dang girl thanks for keeping it real.
Thanks for that, Ashley! 😉
Oh yeah, I can relate! I feel behind most days and there doesn’t seem to be any catching up. For me it’s being more disciplined with my screen time. I should set an alarm for myself 🙂
Haha we all have that one thing that gets us! For me, it seems to be blogging 😉
Yes, I can totally relate!! I have had to relax my standards a lot since #3 came a long, and you know what? I am happier! Thanks for sharing!
That’s awesome! Thanks for sharing that you’re happier – I love it! 🙂
Love this!! I sure don’t have it all together!!
Oh I think that makes just about all of us! Thanks for keepin’ it real too 😉
My blogging is what really gets me behind on everything. I’m working so hard to make it work that sleep, finances, and lots of other self-care stuff is going by the wayside. I’m working on balance. You know? I really don’t have it all together. I’m okay with that. But I do need to work on slowing down a bit. Thanks for your inspiration and encouragement.
Lauren
Lauren! I could have written every single word of your comment myself! Oh wow, thank you for keepin’ it real too – and now I’m coming over to visit this blog of yours and encourage you like you’ve encouraged me 🙂
I am not alone! It feels good to know I have company in “not having it all together”. I find myself asking, “How does he/she do it?” Now I’m reminded, we are all works in progress.
Thank you.
Oh my gosh yes – it is so true. We really are ALL works in progress!
I love how real you are! Too many people act as if they have all together but reality is no one does! There is honor in being truthful with life’s struggles! Love it girl!
What an encouragement you are! Thank you Heather!
I can totally relate. Throughout my life people have always been like “you seem to have it all together” mostly that was because I was never the one to share my business. I am very private but that’s why I love blogging. I get to be transparent and share what’s really going on behind the scenes so people see I’m not perfect but I can point them to my God who is.
So thankful for the gospel of grace! ” I’m not perfect but I can point them to my God who is.” Yes and Amen!
hey syb.. 🙂 great read i was supposd to b findn socktober but chose to read this instead… now my list is longer..lol. anywho.. so true to point out how we r all imperfect… not that i strive too hard but we all feel pressure to b or act a certain way which sometimes at least for me holds me accountable.. it is thru r imperfections that bring us closer to God and become a testimony for others… to c how God is working in us… i fail everyday.. but then He gives me an opportunity to change and grow and strive for better. love u.. so glad u r an inspiration to others and r able to let others in on how u feel ur life isnt “perfect” although i thnk ur pretty amazn even if ur car doesnt look how u want which reminds me of how messy my car is and how a christian friend of mine parked nxt to me at krogers today n as i am puttin my daughter n the car she goes i thought that was u n i have groceries im shovn in my far beyond messy car quickly closing the door so she cant see my obvious lack of caring to b clean.. and i thnk it made her uneasy.. and she said well i better get goin n then i felt bad that i was so worried about appearances that she felt shut out… so i stoppd n went over to her.. but what can u do.. im a mess. and im ok with it but i feel like other people arn’t so i guess i need to just b like oh well… sorry u c the worst of my car today but one day mayb it will b better.. it s on the list 🙂 have a great night
Love love love this comment! Thanks so much for sharing it! xoxo
Hey there… I love this! I am all for keepin’ it real and being authentic and a huge part of that means giving up on perfectionism and letting yourself (and all of your messes and less-than-perfect parts) be seen. I read your list and could say Amen to at least half of them – and add to it myself, as you said! I love that Brene Brown quote too! Great post! We are neighbors over at Holley’s today – happy to be sharing a cup of coffee with you!
In this together,
~Karrilee~
Good to see you, thanks for stopping Karilee 🙂
Oh my I can relate to almost all of these. I really hate to admit I have been skipping showers so I can do other things. I am so excited about getting things done and want so much to learn more about blogging, do more blogging, be the mom I so want to be and many other things that sleep, showers and cleaning have kind of taken a back seat. Starting on Monday I am going to try to live by a schedule. I am going to give my self so much time for each thing I want to do. I am going to do this for two weeks to a month and see if it helps. Anyways I loved the post. It is nice to know I am not the only crazy one.
Yep that makes both of us (and many others too) who feel this way, “I really hate to admit I have been skipping showers so I can do other things. I am so excited about getting things done and want so much to learn more about blogging, do more blogging, be the mom I so want to be and many other things that sleep, showers and cleaning have kind of taken a back seat.” OH it’s good to know we are not alone! Inspired by your thoughts on scheduling – thanks for sharing!
Satan wants us to see others as perfect, to see ourselves as not being able to measure up… he wants us to do anything that gets us to take our eyes off of Christ and we fall for his lies. We all struggle in areas… maybe lots of areas… and we need to stop trying to compete with one another. What a blessing we can be to other sisters… how blessed we can be by other sisters… if we make ourselves vulnerable and approachable. None of us is perfect this side of heaven… and we need to stop giving in to the temptation to look like it. We all all a work in progress, and some days are just plain hard… (many days are! :), but what a blessing to see the work God is doing in us… and in others. Thank you for sharing this. 🙂
I absolutely love your take on this! Thank you so much for sharing!
I absolutely love this post. Sometimes I have to remind myself, no one has it all together. The grass is not always greener. I love how you shared specific things you have struggled with lately. So wonderful to “keep it real”.
So true! Thanks Rebecca 🙂
While reading this not only did I realize I need a shower, but there is a good chance my kids need one too!
Ha!! 😉